Just for fun: Sending myself to a happy place

I guess I’m going through post-vacation blues among other things. So here is me trying to find a happy place within this little wonderful moment:


~The Rinkside Cafe

Thank goodness the Russians laid off the vodka…

… and chose some non-creepy mascots. The Sochi 2014 Olympic mascots, which were chosen by the public, will be the hare, snow leopard and polar bear while the Ray of Light and Snowflake will be the Paralympic mascots. (See my last post to see the mascots.) Hooray! Imagine what it would be like if these things were chosen:

Imagine being the guy who had to dress up as those things to amuse terrify the little children.

I will try and write something for Four Continents but my schedule is so hectic right now that I’ve disconnected my router for the entire day save for one hour until all my work is done.

~The Rinkside Cafe

In Soviet Russia, Polar Bears Use You!

So as I was wandering around the intertubes, I found this: a list of 10 possible choices for Sochi 2014’s mascot. Of course, I had to look through all of the choices and while I did, there were obviously some snarky comments that popped into my head because that’s just the way I am. So here we go.

1. Santa

Doesn’t the Coca-Cola company own Santa? I smell a lawsuit… unless naming this dude Father Frost saves you from that. I should ask my lawyer-in-training friend about this… In any case, may I note that this Santa is super fashion forward? I love the floral patterns on his coat. Just in time for spring. Except… he’s supposed to be the mascot for the *Winter* Olympics.

2. Teddy

Awww… what’s more classic than a teddy bear? Apparently this guy opened a sports school in the Zapovedny Forest (how am I going to pronounce all these Russian names when they pop out at me in 3 years!?) to make all the beasts there fitter. Then again, being fat has its advantages when being an animal. It’s called blubber and hibernation. This teddy should try it sometime. I know that I wish humans would hibernate during the winter.

3. Fire Boy and Snow Girl

These two remind me of the weird, sparkly fire and water effects that were used in a production of The Magic Flute. Sans the sparkles. I think they need sparkles. What happened to the Russian tradition of putting too many sequins on their costumes? They should go see Edward and see what he does to his skin. Speaking of skin, the description attached to these two seem rather obsessive with their skin colour. And I thought the Russian government was trying to downplay its racial issues these days…

4. A Polar Bear

Dear Sochi,

You’re a summer resort for Russians and you can count on a hand or two the number of days that go below zero degrees celsius in an entire year. Why are you hosting a Winter Olympics? (Although admittedly, Vancouver is pretty warm but at least it’s not close to a zone with a history of violent conflict.)

5. Snow Leopard

This guy makes me think of two things:

1. The Mac OS

2. The Cheetos Cheetah

6. The Twitter Bird

Ok. So this is what I think what the Russian designers for the mascot did. They thought up of some fuzzy animals (and little children with pale and amber skin) and then they ran out of ideas for mascots. And then, Eureka. Someone goes, “Hey! Technology is cool!” and they found a few more fuzzy animals related to technology like the snow leopard and the Twitter bird and used them as possible mascots. Someone tell me that I’m not going crazy and that the first thing you thought of when you saw this bird was Twitter.

And the narrative continues. After thinking about cute animals related to technology, the designers got stumped again and so they got some vodka. And this is what they came up with…

7. A Skiing… Dolphin!? WTF?

How does this even work?

8. The Sun!?!?

Ok, you guys seriously need to lay off the vodka.

9. Bowling Pins

These things are almost creepier and uglier than Wenlock and Mandeville, the London 2012 mascots and that’s saying something. (I had to find a picture of those London… things and was shocked at how horrendous looking they were… even though I’ve already seen them.) These guys are supposed to be matryoshka dolls but all I can say is that they’re terribly fugly. I don’t know where to start my comments… should I talk about the hobo stubble on the blue hockey player, their bathtub porcelain bodies or the fact that they look nothing like matryoshkas. I don’t know, all I do know is that these things are ugly as f$%@.

10. BUNNY!

Ok, a mascot that wasn’t conceived on vodka. They need to take this bunny to the Japanese who will make this so cute that it’s illegal.

You know what I’d like to see for the Sochi mascot? The use of those wing patterns on the Team Russia Jackets. Maybe turn the thing into a fire or thunderbird or something. I’m sure the Russians can fabricate some sort of story about how it relates to the country’s origins and whatnot.

Thoughts? I’d love to hear them!

~The Rinkside Cafe

Moment in History: HAPPY GOOSE DAY!

Don’t know what I’m talking about?

‘Nuff said.

~The Rinkside Cafe

(Credits for the name of this sort-of holiday to a member of the Tessa & Scott fangroup on facebook.)


I apologize as I will be unable to offer any further commentary for Four Continents. I will be away, stranded with no internet access so the only posts that will appear are ones I have written beforehand. I may do a write-up after my foray into the wilderness but in the meantime, please visit my favourite figure skating blogger, Aunt Joyce and ontd_skating for news, commentary and scores. But stay tuned! There will be a few posts in the next few days!

~The Rinkside Cafe

Let’s Try and Think of Something Happy…

Because it’s the weekend!

*Sending my happy vibes to Tessa Virtue. I hope you are too.*


~The Rinkside Cafe


Tessa and Scott withdrew midway through their FD. It looked fabulous and it seems like a shame that it couldn’t happen. The internets have been exploding and Michael Slipchuk has confirmed that Tessa withdrew because she felt tightness in her left thigh. Additional Tweets inform us that this is apparently not related to surgeries and that she’s been feeling it since before she came to Taipei. A press conference should be happening now and we’ll see what else is said. Tessa and Scott will not be attending due so Tessa can get treated but hopefully Slipchuk or Marina and Igor have some news for us. I hope that they’ll take the time to recover and be able to compete at Worlds. Or even the World Team Trophy.

Following Tessa and Scott’s withdrawal, Meryl and Charlie won the competition handily with the Shibushibus in second and Crone/Poirier rounding out the podium. A bit of a nightmare compared to what we had yesterday.

Hoping that Tessa feels better soon!

~The Rinkside Cafe

Edit: An article with stuff we already knew but reiterated with Mike Slipchuck.

Edit 2: CBC did an interview with Tessa and she spoke briefly during this clip.

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